Tommy meiklejohn:This term we have been looking at ways to make our writing more interesting for the reader.
We have used the following criteria to guide us:
Changing the word order of a sentence
Using literary devices such as metaphor, simile, alliteration, onomatopoeia and personification
Using specific verbs and adjectives
Using show, don’t tell techniques
Using different sentence beginnings and lengths
ere are some examples of my writing this term.
Show Don’t Tell - Emotions
Sad: I was in tears my mum and dad said we have to put our dog down. I was sobbing and could hardly talk and in a tearful soft voice said “it's for the best”
Joy: I was jumping up and down with the new puppy in my hands. I was crying in happiness, my boiling hot face was filled with burning tears. , t was so fluffy “Mum I love it” I said.
Angry: My face was boiling red, I stared at mum with this devilish look she looked back at me and said “what why you mad at me what did i do?” i looked at her and didn't say anything and stormed off to my room and slammed my door.
The music writing
John,elvan and jack were walking in the foggy forest they were tiptoeing in the forest suddenly they heard groans getting closer and closer suddenly they were right in front of them. ZOMBIES john yelled john and elvan starting shooting at them but jack froze one came up behind him and started eating him and that was the last scene of jack. in the end they found a cure and lived on the rest of their lives.
The boy gets bullied
I was walking slowly to the dairy when a bully called jack yelled out in his meanest voice GIVE ME YOUR MONEY OR ELSE. Then being me I said NO. I tried to stand up for myself. Suddenly he tried to hit me and he yelled at me saying “I told you to give me your money or else ok so GIVE IT”. I said no so he knocked me to the ground and in a sarcastic voice oh thanks friend for the money. Then my brother walked round the corner and yelled out “oi! Leave my brother alone”. so he walked up to him took the money off him and in a soft voice “leave or else” .“or else what”? He said in a smug voice. My brother looked at him saying “you do not want to know” in a sarcastic voice. and he wasn't leaving so my brother stepped him out and he sprinted off. “You alright little bro?” “yes thanks though” “algoods now let's get to that dairy I bet Ii could beat you there” “no you can't” I yelled while running. They sprinted off to the dairy and that was the end of that.
Viking Girl
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAA HHHHHHHHHHH I'VE HAD ENOUGH” and she slammed the door. “ALL I WANTED WAS MY PONY COSTUME NOT THIS WHATEVER IT IS”. Her eyes were black and baggy. her head was down. I'm gonna get you she thought. Her foot kept on slamming on the ground.. Her mum replied “No! it was too expensive”
Text to text Assignment.
I can’t think of a book but i have watched a movie once called the maze runner.
How this is pretty close to the book because they have been sent to a random place and they have to survive off their things and grow their own food and their is this a maze that opens up at certain times and there is these people that are maze runners and they have to try and look for a way out of the place and then every once and awhile someone new comes up this elevator type thing and it always brings up a new crate with
Food and drink in it. And in the end like the book they found their way out of the maze. And that was the end.
Text to self.
The closest thing i have to the book is knocking myself out.
Well it was just a normal day after school i went to the skate park about fifteen minutes in i had hit the coping and knocked myself out i had to go to the hospital and didn't get back to very late at night.
Text to world
Well i don't really watch the news but in israel and other places like that they have to survive from the war and all the bombings that are happening how this is a connection to the book is they have to be careful where they go or they could get killed. But what is different that they're not trying to find their way back they are trying to escape
